Forty Six & Two

Join in my
Join in my child
and listen ...
Digging through
My old numb shadow

My shadow's
Shedding skin
and I've been picking
scabs again.
I'm down
digging through
my old muscles
for a clue.
I've been crawling on my belly
clearing out what could've been.
I've been wallowing in my own confused
and insecure delusions
for a piece to cross me over
or a word to guide me in.
I wanna feel the changes coming down.
I wanna know what I've been hiding
in my shadow
my shadow
Change is coming through my shadow.
My shadow's
shedding skin.
I've been picking
my scabs again.

Join in my
Join in my child,
my shadow moves,
closer to me

I've been crawling on my belly
clearing out what could've been
I've been wallowing in my own chaotic,
insecure delusions.
I wanna feel the change consume me,
feel the outside turning in.
I wanna feel the metamorphosis and
cleansing I've endured in,
my shadow
my shadow
Change is coming.
Now is my time.
Listen to my muscle memory.
Contemplate what I've been clinging to.
Forty-six and two ahead of me.

I,
choose to live and to,
grow,
take and give and to,
move,
learn and love and to,
cry,
kill and die and to,
be,
paranoid and to,
lie,
hate and fear and to,
do,
what it takes to move through.

I choose to live and to,
lie,
kill and give and to,
die,
learn and love and to,
do,
what it takes to step through.

See my shadow changing,
stretching up and over me
soften this old armor.
Hoping I can clear the way by
stepping through my shadow,
coming out the other side.
Step into the shadow.
Forty six and two
are just ahead of me.